Sunday, February 23, 2014

Most Eligible GROOM - Condition Serious Hai

Marriage in itself is a very funny institution and on top of this the grooms which we come across in the matrimonial websites and newspapers and more so the LIVE samples, are hilarious. Though we all know the Indian matrimony scene ki CONDITION SERIOUS HAI, we still are very serious about our favourite mistake of life.
Every girl dreams of a prospective groom who has looks of John Abraham, bank balance of Siddarth Mallya, brainy as Anand Vishwanathan and passionate as much as Shah Rukh. But the reality is far from the fantasy world.
This blog is about the super confident prospective GROOM who has the following golden characteristics:
  • ·         Waistline of 48”
  • ·         Bald
  • ·         365 * 24 * 7 Flirt
  • ·         Spendthrift
  • ·         Of the Opinion that he is God’s Gift to Mankind
Before you wonder whether such an undesirable GROOM really exists, let me tell you – it does and it is Yours Truly “ME”. The good news is that God does not repeat mistakes and hence you are unlikely to come across a replica.
48”
When people refer to my integral 48”, my response is that while Salman Khan has a 6 pack, I have a 24 pack. Vidya Balan became an inspiration to turn from size zero to voluptuous for the Silk Smitha act. I can surely enjoy my 5 star with a lot more liberty and live life king size. So am I not a little more desirable?
Bald
Commenting on my bald look, at least my partner can rest assured that I will save money on the oil, shampoo and the comb in these times of inflation. Not to add, the indefinite time in front of the mirror which I can utilize to admire her? So am I not a little more desirable?
365*24*7 Flirt
My personal philosophy is that there are only 2 types of girls – Good and Very good. I also read and fully believe - Women are like oceans; the deeper you go, the deeper they are. I am just discovering the fairer sex which will help me to understand my partner better. It is not without reason that it has been statistically proven that flirty hubbies are a lot more loving and sincere and they also add more spice and zest to married life. So am I not a little more desirable?
Spendthrift
The golden rule of accounting is debit what comes in, credit what goes out. In a nutshell, the bottomline is that you need to earn to be able to spend and this quality will make me want to work harder and earn more. I will also appreciate the bride’s shopping habits out of empathy which will keep the bride happier. So am I not a little more desirable?
God’s gift to mankind
Well isn’t every child a god’s gift to his or her parents? My parents named me “Ashish” which means blessing in English. So my pick up line is “Do you know the 11th commandment?” The response was “Thou shall not live without ‘Ashish’.” Sounds nice, doesn’t it? So what’s wrong if I think a little highly of myself? The name, the humour justifies it. So am I not a little more desirable?
So when I have attended the status of being desirable in spite of the odds, I would like to propose this most Eligible Bachelor to you. Let me know if we can we enjoy the Cadbury 5 star together to share this SERIOUS CONDITION of life?
This blog is written with the intention of participating in the contest ConditionSeriousHai at Indiblogger.in.

6 comments:

  1. Seriously he's a serious groom for parents who are not so serious about their daughter's welfare.

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    1. In India, all the grooms need a fair, slim, cultured, homely and adjusting girl. And even the groom in the above post might have the same expectations :)

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  2. Remember the lists girls make for eligible groom! :) Nice stories are a "blessing" like 5 Star! :)
    Best wishes, Dipti :)

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    1. U bet, I check the matrimony coloumn when i m in need of a hearty laugh :) This post is inspired from there!!

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  3. Oh trust me! You are very very desirable now!! :D
    Good luck with the contest!

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